Thursday, June 11, 2009


Well, it's gonna get interesting next week. I'm having surgery, tho not a major surgery, but surgery just the same. I'm going "under the knife" on the 16th and I'll just put it to you this way; if you don't hear from me after a month or so, then the surgery was prolly unsuccessful. Let's pray for a very successful surgery. Not to go into great detail, 'cause I'm sqeamish as it is about stuff like this and I'll spare the rest of you who are either sqeamish as well, or bore easily, but I'm having a lymph node removed in my neck, right under the jaw line. It's the one that everyone has that supposed to swell up when you get colds and stuff. I also have a lump in the back of my throat that has to go, too, so basically, two surgeries in one. Fun times! A word of advice to those of you who just love watching those medical dramas like I do. DON'T watch any medical drama shows anytime soon before having surgery, if they make you in the least bit paranoid. 'Cause I have all kinds of great lil' scenarios playing out in my warped brain about any kind of possible complication that could happen during my minor surgery. And in each of my nightmarish fantasies, I end up dead, or with some type of permanent disfiguring damange. Not good... I love watching medical shows like Scrubs, (which is not a drama, but still can inflict some paranoid tendancies) Grey's Anatomy, House and Private Practice. Not to mention a few of the reality medical shows on the Discovery channel. Why, oh why must I have such an insatiable appetite for this kind of stuff?'s addicting and let's be honest, it's fun. Like a scab, we can't help but pick.... We love trying to diagnose the symptoms before the Dr's do. And when/if we do, then by golly, we feel smarter than those tv Dr's and think we could make a killing once we get our PhD. Oh, and another good piece of advice. DON'T look up your symptoms online. It almost never ends up a harmless diagnosis. I could look up the worst possible fatal disease, just for funsies and I could be perfectly healthy and feeling great and then I see the symptoms of this aweful fatal disease and guess what? I'll prolly have a few of the symptoms! And even tho, I don't have this disease, it's now stuck in my head and I'm obsessed over the very slight possibility of having the dreaded disease, tho highly unlikely in real life but in my warped brain, I'm 99 percent sure, I've got the disease now. Then I start feeling sick and then I'm thinking I'm gonna die within 24 hours. Talk about paranoia. I'm not a hypochondriac, but watching medical drama's turns me into a temporary one at least an hour afterwards and then real life hits me and I feel dumb for thinking I or someone I know might have whatever the latest medical drama show has diagnosed. Call me up and give me your symptoms and I guarantee I'll find the diagnosis. It wouldn't be just one diagnosis. It would be at least 20 diagnosis's. And don't be surprised if you have an extrememly rare, almost unheard of disease. Your symptoms could be nothing more than a sore throat and I'll diagnose you with some sort of aweful terminal throat cancer, when really, your throat is sore because you slept with the fan on the night before. You know, on second thought, just go to the Dr.
So, I have been pretty good lately. I did not look up my symptoms online. I went to the Dr and I have listened to just him. I miss my medical drama shows, but I am abstaining from them until after my surgery. It's for the best of my mental health, which, if any of you know me personally, knows just what a mental case I already am.
Today, I went in for my pre op. I was made aware of possible complications. Not the best thing to enlighten someone who is already scared for her life, that she could end up paralyzed, in pain for the rest of her life, disfigured, or die. I would much rather be happily ignorant and oblivious at this point. But I understand, they are obligated to make the patient aware of the possibilites, good or bad, so they aren't held liable, after I sign my death warrant, er, I mean consent forms.
So, I think I will take off the rest of this week to reflect on my life and prepare for surgery. If any of you who are reading this, like to pray, please say a prayer for me. I look forward to posting again, at least within the next month, at the longest. And if not, well, farewell!
Hugs, God bless and God willing, I'll talk to you soon...